School Life: with No Music Interest
I’ve talked about how there were people who helped me through low points. On the other hand there was something else that helped through the very dark and low points of my life. This was listening to certain music. Born in the ’90s and grew up with that generation of music, which back then I didn’t particular like. It certainly did not help my anxiety – the music was loud and I couldn’t hear the lyrics properly. The problem is when I process multiple sounds my brain cannot separate these sounds. This means it sounds like one big entity rather than little parts co-existing. With some music, this actually works really well and I experience it in a different way. Other music it gives me a headache as my brain struggles to comprehend what is going on.
It made me unpopular with the children of my age because I didn’t like the music they liked. I didn’t like any music in primary school.
When I joined secondary school, I had my first official exposure to Classical Music. My form tutor would play occasionally during Form time (basically in the morning before lesson started, morning break and lunch). There was something ‘mighty clever’ (my exact thought), and relaxing about it. Plus with no lyrics my brain processed it easier. While the other members of the class scoffed at the music, I enjoyed it, as it helped control my anxiety. Just as I started my GCSE year I found some pieces of music that would help me even more than the Classical pieces did.
Just before my GCSEs there were two positive, major-life changing events. Firstly, I had French lessons which, at was causing me most of my anxiety, were removed from my curriculum. Secondly, was being introduced to two pieces of music.
Both musics helped me defuse during low points, especially during my GCSE revision and they really did help improve my self-esteem. The first one was Jeff Wayne’s Musical Version of the War of the Worlds – an album with orchestral and rock type music with a few songs here and there.
The second, and most powerful album against my anxiety – even to this day – is Tubular Bells. Tubular Bells is a two piece musical track by Mike Oldfield. Despite the horror connection the tune Tubular Bells has (the first 3 minutes being used as The Exorcist Theme) it has an impressive record of keeping my anxiety and depression controllable. Fortunately I don’t get as many low or as depressed these days, but when it does happen, this great piece of music is what I fall back on.
Ironically both albums have had a ‘remake’ to bring it into the modern times (As these albums came out in the ’70s!). The originals, for me, are superior but the new sounds are almost just as good.
There are other albums that Mike Oldfield has released, many of which also help with my anxiety. He has released a brand new album today called ‘Return to Ommadawn’ a really amazing piece of work that I am confident will be good at soothing during the rough times.
Now-a-days I still have problem processing music, especially ones with lyrics, but my brain has learned to cope better and not get overwhelmed as much. I can enjoy the music – even if I have a hard time processing and understand the lyrics!